post-the fault in our stars

So yeah, I just watched the fault in our stars, I'm so freaking lucky because i get to see it like I watched it 6 days earlier than everyone in my country. The movie that I have been waiting since last year, the movie that I've been dying to see. Actually I want to see gus. Even though you just can see gus in 2 hours long but that's my reason. So how is it after you watch? What do you feel? 

What do i feel? I feel numb. I can not feel anything. I feel like I already lost my soul and I'm not exaggerating it, i'm more than serious. I LOVE GUS. BUT I AM NOT PREPARED TO LOSE GUS EVEN THOUGH I ALREADY KNEW IT. Every time I read the book I always cry in the end and said "why gus? Why gus have to go? Why? It's not fair." And i know Gus is just a fictional character but THANKS TO ANSEL ELGORT WHO HAVE DONE AMAZINGLY ACTING AND BE GUS I JUST CANT SAY HOW GOOD HE WAS. I could feel gus alive in the movie. So yeah the movie goes just like the book, how Hazel met Gus and their stories. 

Let me just tell you when my heart got broken okay? So it's begin when the scene is in Amsterdam. When Gus finally tell Hazel that he was going to die. i almost crying so hard that time but it stopped until Gus' pre-funeral. When Isaac tell "I DISLIKE LIVIN IN A WORLD WITHOUT AUGUSTUS WATERS." And I cried so hard when it comes to Hazel's turn to speech. This quote is one of my favorite quotes from tfios, "Gus, I cant say how thankful I am for our little infinity, you give me forever... Within the numbered days.." And i cried, i cried so hard that I could feel the pressure in my chest. AND THE FINAL: when Hazel got the call, when Hazel found out that Gus is dead. she cried so hard and me too, and my friend too. Even while I wrote this I still can not forget the scene, the picture of hazel who crying so hard when she found out that Gus is not here anymore...

For me, as a reader and as an audience I love it so much. I love the fault in our stars more than anything, the cast, shai, ansel, nat they really did a good acting. All the characters feels so alive in the movie, the music, josh boone as director and of course lovely John Green who writes this amazingly beautiful book, thank you for making a perfect fictional character who has an amazing smile that slayed a thousands heart hahaha. I can't wait to watch it again! 6 days to go!

(p.s. : i wear black dress so it's like i attended gus's funeral... Haha:) love you gus)

Let me give a quote from TFIOS book, Augustus's letter:

"What else? She is so beautiful. You don’t get tired of looking at her. You never worry if she is smarter than you: You know she is. She is funny without ever being mean. I love her. I am so lucky to love her, Van Houten. You don’t get to choose if you get hurt in this world, old man, but you do have some say in who hurts you. I like my choices. I hope she likes hers."

Love always, 

Ret

[ E X T R A ] throwback to last year when ansel answered my twitter question woohoo :)

Officially graduated from high school, next: college!

Wooooooooohoooooooooooooooo!!!! I won't wear that uniform anymore, I'm officially graduated from high school means that I'm going to college too. It's so fast, seriously, I feel like yesterday I was graduated from junior high and the next day I'm graduated from high school? Are you kidding me? High school feels so fast, it really go fast seriously. Well I'm not going to say much to you today actually i just wanna share my high school moments aka coret-coretan and graduation, and also i just want to let you know that right now i'm preparing and yet waiting for my student visa, please pray for me that i'll get the visa :)
Graduation pic: ( with my crazy mofos lol you guys )

High school moment pics: